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That C word again

Posted: 24 Mar 2015, 21:44
by Kwacky
I was hoping to keep this out of public for as long as possible, but it looks like mother nature has forced my hand.

Last October my father in law was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer. Those who know, know that this one isn't good. He's got months left to live.

He's in his early 80s and, cancer aside, was in excellent health. The heart breaking thing isn't the cancer, it's the fact he was looking forward to celebrating his 60th wedding anniversary this summer. We are all hoping he'll be fit and healthy enough for it.

Although surgery was offered it was never an option. The survival rates are poor, there's a poor chance all of the cancer will be removed and even if he survives the operation he'll be so physically weakened by it he won't be able to enjoy his final days.

He's had a set back today. He's in hospital. We think it's the chemo, which he's taking to slow the growth down.

I have no idea how long he's going to be with us. I don't know if it's going to be a slow drawn out process or if he'll go quickly. Ron is being very philosophical about it all. He's in his 80s, got all his marbles, has seen his daughter grow up and have her own kids. He gets chance to say goodbye.

So this is nothing more than a heads up for this year. My reason for posting is to let you know I might cancel plans or disappear without warning, or be acting weirder than usual.

Re: That C word again

Posted: 24 Mar 2015, 22:01
by duke63
Very sorry to hear that, Kwacky.

This shitty disease affects the lives of far too many people.

Re: That C word again

Posted: 24 Mar 2015, 22:04
by Mac
Very sorry to hear this Rich. Pancreatic cancer claimed my great aunt some time back. My sympathies and thoughts are with you and your family.

Re: That C word again

Posted: 24 Mar 2015, 22:08
by Blade
Terrible news Kwacky mate. Thoughts and prayers are with all your family. Im sure I speak for everyone at TS. If you need anything or any help you know where we are mate.

Re: That C word again

Posted: 24 Mar 2015, 22:09
by Kwacky
Cancer rates have gone up dramatically over the last 30 years. It's frightening. The poisons we put in food and drink can't help.

Anyway, thanks all, you're a very supportive bunch.

Re: That C word again

Posted: 24 Mar 2015, 22:42
by beermonster
Awful news Rich. If there's anything I can do just holler (and at the very least if you fancy a pint then let me know). Give Sam my love too - it must be tough for her, but if it's any consolation at least she'll get the chance to say goodbye. Treasure the good times.

Re: That C word again

Posted: 24 Mar 2015, 23:06
by Monty
So sorry mate lost my Granddad to that, not going to be easy.

Re: That C word again

Posted: 25 Mar 2015, 08:48
by rocket
Sorry to hear this kwacky I hope things go as well as they can.

Re: That C word again

Posted: 25 Mar 2015, 09:49
by Perkles
I already knew about this but i am always up for a beer or balti if you need to talk or get out the house

Re: That C word again

Posted: 25 Mar 2015, 10:14
by Si.
My heartfelt wishes to him Rich.

Thinking of you all mate. xx

Re: That C word again

Posted: 25 Mar 2015, 10:18
by Kwacky
Monty wrote:So sorry mate lost my Granddad to that, not going to be easy.
That's the bit I'm worried about. My wife is an only child and very much a daddy's girl (I mean that in a nice way). I know it's really going to get to her to see her old man waste away and be in so much pain.

Quite why a person can't elect to end it when they're in that state is beyond me, but the government knows best. I've always been a supporter of this campaign http://www.dignityindying.org.uk/" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;

Re: That C word again

Posted: 25 Mar 2015, 10:40
by Monty
Kwacky wrote:
Monty wrote:So sorry mate lost my Granddad to that, not going to be easy.
That's the bit I'm worried about. My wife is an only child and very much a daddy's girl (I mean that in a nice way). I know it's really going to get to her to see her old man waste away and be in so much pain.

Quite why a person can't elect to end it when they're in that state is beyond me, but the government knows best. I've always been a supporter of this campaign http://www.dignityindying.org.uk/" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;
If you need any help and advise try contacting Davina (davina.hehir@dignityindying.org.uk). She works mostly on the legal strategy side for DID, but I'm sure she would point you in the right direction if you just wanted to talk to somebody.

Re: That C word again

Posted: 25 Mar 2015, 10:44
by Kwacky
That's helpful,. cheers.

Re: That C word again

Posted: 25 Mar 2015, 13:21
by Kwacky
Half of us will get cancer at some point according to this BBC article.

That's encouraging.........

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/health-32025505" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;

Re: That C word again

Posted: 25 Mar 2015, 13:53
by Perkles
cancer rates go up as life expectancy gets longer.I read that every male who lives into longer life will have some level of prostrate cancer but not necessarily die of it

Re: That C word again

Posted: 26 Mar 2015, 21:53
by kiwikrasher
Crap news Kwacky, both my wife and I have had our fathers go thru cancer in the last 5 yrs, but I couldn't imagine doing that knowing there's not hope. Gutted for you mate.

Re: That C word again

Posted: 26 Mar 2015, 22:05
by Bratty
Very sorry to read this mate Shaz and my thoughts are with you and Sam and the rest of the family.

Re: That C word again

Posted: 26 Mar 2015, 22:08
by Frankie
Sorry to read this, I must have missed this post, hence my comment in the Jerez thread. My thoughts are with you and your family at this time, I have a very good friend in the position at the moment :(

Re: That C word again

Posted: 27 Mar 2015, 09:47
by bb41
yes it is horrid Kwacky, as you know my Mum had it many years ago and was lucky enough to survive the op and didn't have to endure chemo.

Where theres life there's hope and new advances can make heaps of difference to quality of life.

Sadly I lost my Mum a little over a month ago to Asbestos cancer , she just managed to see 79 .

My only consolation was that as we knew time was very limited my girls and I managed to get time to say everything we needed and wanted to say, and to say our goodbyes. It was a very precious time and hope you can do the same.

When I lost my Dad 20 years ago and my brother even longer through accident and sudden death there were so many things I didn't say soon enough.

Give all our loved ones an extra special hug whether they are ill or not, I wish I could have just 10 more minutes with all of them and would give anything to give them all a hug just one more time.

I wonder why life throws out so much sadness and how we get through it. To those who are caring for very sick loved ones I hope you are getting good support as it is very tough watching someone you love deeply suffer. I found the person who is going through it more tough than those caring for them. It is particularly hard now as I only have my 2 girls as all my family have departed .

Hang on in there Kwacky and an invitation to all if you are ever near Llandeilo way , please come and call in, cake and tea always at hand and even a shoulder if need be.


My situation has been made worse as I am now having to sell my bike this weekend as so far I've spent over 11k on funeral costs and expenses in the last month and until solicitors reimburse me it's left my savings pot well and truly depleted and my bike is a luxury I can't afford immediately. I know I will get another bike soon but this one was special, it lead my Mum's hearse.

Still I suppose if I look on the bright side I can go bike hunting in a month or so, and may look at the Street Triple as a replacement :-)

Re: That C word again

Posted: 27 Mar 2015, 11:06
by Rossgo
Sorry to hear this mate best wishes mate