Tank Slap - Motorcycle Forum

My moped crashes were mostly alcohol related!

I've never crashed on the road ***touches wood*** the scooter was always in carparks being an idiot and trying to wheelie it (never hit a car thou' R34PER!) and about three times going into my driveway as it was light gravel and I kept going in too hot.

Once on my RZ250 rather drunk, in my dads back yard trying to move it into the garage, ended up in his vege patch

Since then all my crashes have been on the track or in the bush when I was trail riding (green laning)

I think one of the best crashes I've ever seen was some guy ahead of me when I was out dirt-bike riding. He laid it down on the right side at a slow clip, and the throttle dug into the ground and was spinning him and the bike around like a pinwheel for about a half-dozen revolutions before the motor cut out. Spaz.

kiwikrasher wrote:Maybe take him under your wing and teach him a thing of two!

Mind you my first bike was a scooter and I seemed to come off that thing almost weekly! 30 yrs later and still kicking! (and crashing )

Fwiw I was just as bad (probably still am ) However my thoughts were that I doubt I would have survived if the standard of driving & volume of traffic were as bad as they are these days. So his days may well be numbered.

online twats who post dose instead of does. You lazy feckers need to fecking learn English.

Kwacky wrote:online twats who post dose instead of does. You lazy feckers need to fecking learn English.

Don't forget the dimwits who try to make out they know the law better than a proper solicitor dose..

I am glad the guy Owned up, that's a plus. Reading about crashes reminded me of back in the day, when we used to terrorise the streets in packs on moped, loads of us, always crashing mostly into each other
The one that comes to mind is when my mate lost control, hit the curb, went overthe handle bars and ended up in someone's front garden, in a bush... still with his fag handing out his mouth ha ha ha ha.

So I get home tonight, and Jess is off work on Friday so we had a ride planned on the bike. The weather at home has been glorious for the last two weeks, 30-38 deg C and no rain.

Fridays forecast is 15mm rain and high of 20 deg

That's a glorious summers day in the UK

I'm sure you can think of something else to do, kiwi.

People who think it's fine and dandy to come into the office and then proceed to spend the day hacking their guts up.

If you do insist on coming in (even though we have a sick policy and you can work from home) then kindly ensure you have adequate medication to stifle or suppress your rather annoying cough

Otherwise I'll cure it for you, by slitting your throat.

Many thanks.

Kwacky wrote:People who think it's fine and dandy to come into the office and then proceed to spend the day hacking their guts up.

If you do insist on coming in (even though we have a sick policy and you can work from home) then kindly ensure you have adequate medication to stifle or suppress your rather annoying cough

Otherwise I'll cure it for you, by slitting your throat.

Many thanks.

Wonder how they caught that nasty cough mate.?
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Kwacky wrote:I'm at that delightful chesty cough stage of the cold.

So I've come into work to share it.

You're not infectious at the cough stage of a cold.

Besides, I was good enough to take a day off when I was full of cold.

Pricks who leave their fog lights on.

They're fog lights. Lights for when there's fog. You use them when it's foggy, that's why they're called fog lights. It's all the name.

Twats,

Kwacky wrote:Pricks who leave their fog lights on.

They're fog lights. Lights for when there's fog. You use them when it's foggy, that's why they're called fog lights. It's all the name.

Twats,

I don't tend to agree with you here...........you also use them to look like a bad ass

Completely agree with Kwacky, I followed a car home the other night that had its rear fogs on in perfect visibility, so I put my headlights on main beam (courteously dipping for any oncoming traffic of course) it took them 6 miles and an 8 min wait at a level crossing before they got the message and turned them off - I returned the compliment of course.

Childish (and probably illegal) I know, but sometimes they've just got to learn.

Good news bad news, I recently purchased a new lid from the Sportbike shop (online) I was very happy with the next day timed delivery all free of charge, the quality of the packaging and services second to none.
My only gripe was the price had gone down 75 notes over night, only noticed as I happen to look at some others items the next day. Obviously bad timing on my part but also a kick in the teeth as I had take some long to sort this out.

So I wrote to them a very polite email highlighting my annoyance. Well I take my hat off to them, I received a refund for the difference and a nice email suggesting a gesture of good will.
You can't say fairer than that. Merry Christmas Sportsbikeshop.co.uk.

That's top customer service.

Kwacky wrote:Pricks who leave their fog lights on.

They're fog lights. Lights for when there's fog. You use them when it's foggy, that's why they're called fog lights. It's all the name.

Twats,

Funnily enough, I had this Facebook reminder the other day.

Ok then Fog Light Wankers, a quick recap for you...

1. Rain is not fog, and does not necessitate the use of fog lights.
2. Night time is not fog, so see above.
3. Wind, ice and overcast skies are still not fog. See f*cking above.
4. You don't look cool and they don't make you see any further. The only thing they do in non-foggy weather is mark you out for the c*nt that you are.

Merry Christmas, you Fog Light Wankers!!!

Posted 4 years ago, it would appear nothing has changed!

HAHA, I call them T@wat Lamps