Joke of the day
- D6Nutz
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Re: Joke of the day
Bloke shopping in 2021
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You never really learn to swear until you learn to drive.
If everything seems under control, you're not going fast enough - Mario Andretti
If everything seems under control, you're not going fast enough - Mario Andretti
- Kwacky
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Re: Joke of the day
I've been tested positive for Covid. I've not been out. The doctor reckons I've caught it off the cat. Don't ask meow.
- kiwikrasher
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- Kwacky
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- Stonesie
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- Kwacky
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- kiwikrasher
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Re: Joke of the day
What’s a bag of crisps and a gun got in common?
Everyone’s nice to you if you bring them to school
Everyone’s nice to you if you bring them to school
Happiness is not a destination. It is a way of life.
- Monty
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- Stonesie
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- duke63
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- Kwacky
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- Stonesie
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- Kwacky
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Re: Joke of the day
We are so lucky to still have jobs currently. I had a bloke decorating my house for the last three days. I got chatting to him and he is a Ryanair pilot on Furlough. He is decorating now to try and pay his mortgage, sad times but in fairness he did a great job on the landing.
- Stonesie
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- Stonesie
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- Monty
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- D6Nutz
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Re: Joke of the day
As you may have heard there's been some scumbag going round our way breaking in to people's houses for months, but the police couldn't catch him, despite knowing his name - Callum.
His general MO was breaking into people's houses through a utility room window (often left open) specifically to destroy their washing machines by putting bricks into them & turning them on, whilst helping himself to whatever he wanted from the rest of the house.
Vindictive and odd, but effective for quite a while.
Anyway, just read elsewhere that he was found dead in an alley from a drug overdose. It's never nice hearing of someone's death, I wouldn’t wish that on anyone.
But on the bright side, washing machines live longer with Cal gone...
Sorry
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You never really learn to swear until you learn to drive.
If everything seems under control, you're not going fast enough - Mario Andretti
If everything seems under control, you're not going fast enough - Mario Andretti
- duke63
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- Stonesie
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Re: Joke of the day
Scientists in the 90's
We have successfully cloned a Sheep, she's called Dolly and is 100% healthy. Our American friends have landed a rover on Mars which landed safely and is sending back amazing data!
Scientists in the 2020's
For the millionth time! THE EARTH IS ROUND!!!
We have successfully cloned a Sheep, she's called Dolly and is 100% healthy. Our American friends have landed a rover on Mars which landed safely and is sending back amazing data!
Scientists in the 2020's
For the millionth time! THE EARTH IS ROUND!!!
- kiwikrasher
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