Joke of the day
- duke63
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- duke63
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- duke63
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- C00kiemonster
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Re: Joke of the day
Lol, but I hate to think of what you where searching for to find that!duke63 wrote:
You never really learn to swear until you learn to drive.
If everything seems under control, you're not going fast enough - Mario Andretti
If everything seems under control, you're not going fast enough - Mario Andretti
- Stonesie
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Re: Joke of the day
A frog goes into a bank and approaches the teller. He can see from her nameplate that her name is Patty Whack.
"Miss Whack, I'd like to get a £30,000 loan to take a holiday."
Patty looks at the frog in disbelief and asks his name. The frog says his name is Kermit Jagger, his dad is Mick Jagger, and that it's okay, he knows the bank manager.
Patty explains that he will need to secure the loan with some collateral.
The frog says, "Sure. I have this," and produces a tiny porcelain elephant, about an inch tall, bright pink and perfectly formed.
Very confused, Patty explains that she'll have to consult with the bank manager and disappears into a back office.
She finds the manager and says, "There's a frog called Kermit Jagger out there who claims to know you and wants to borrow £30,000, and he wants to use this as collateral." She holds up the tiny pink elephant. "I mean, what in the world is this?"
(You're gonna love this.)
The bank manager looks back at her and says, "It's a knickknack, Patty Whack. Give the frog a loan. His old man's a Rolling Stone."
(You sang it, didn't you? Yeah, I know you did.)
"Miss Whack, I'd like to get a £30,000 loan to take a holiday."
Patty looks at the frog in disbelief and asks his name. The frog says his name is Kermit Jagger, his dad is Mick Jagger, and that it's okay, he knows the bank manager.
Patty explains that he will need to secure the loan with some collateral.
The frog says, "Sure. I have this," and produces a tiny porcelain elephant, about an inch tall, bright pink and perfectly formed.
Very confused, Patty explains that she'll have to consult with the bank manager and disappears into a back office.
She finds the manager and says, "There's a frog called Kermit Jagger out there who claims to know you and wants to borrow £30,000, and he wants to use this as collateral." She holds up the tiny pink elephant. "I mean, what in the world is this?"
(You're gonna love this.)
The bank manager looks back at her and says, "It's a knickknack, Patty Whack. Give the frog a loan. His old man's a Rolling Stone."
(You sang it, didn't you? Yeah, I know you did.)
You never really learn to swear until you learn to drive.
If everything seems under control, you're not going fast enough - Mario Andretti
If everything seems under control, you're not going fast enough - Mario Andretti
- duke63
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- duke63
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- D6Nutz
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Re: Joke of the day
This may be of interest to someone. A friend of mine has 2 tickets in a corporate box for England v Croatia game on Wednesday 11th July. He paid £500 each including flights but didn't realise when he bid for them months ago that England would be in this game and worse was he was getting married on that day. If anyone is interested he is looking for someone to take his place. It's at Loughborough registry office at 5.00 pm. The bride’s name is Helen- she's 5'5" about 8st 7 lb; quite pretty, has her own income and is a really good cook.
You never really learn to swear until you learn to drive.
If everything seems under control, you're not going fast enough - Mario Andretti
If everything seems under control, you're not going fast enough - Mario Andretti