Weekend plans

[Kwacky]

Anyone up to anything?

Back to the gym tonight. I've not been for almost 2 weeks. It's going to hurt

Hopefully picking the dog up on Saturday. She had an op yesterday so they need to make sure she's ok to come home.

Sunday and Monday a mix of spending time helping the dog settle in, giving the Versys a good scrub, putting the skid pan back on the AT, hopefully getting out on the MV and some family time.

[kiwikrasher]

Last weekend before I get the kids back and Jess is kid free too. So currently (Friday evening) working our way through S02 GOT and enjoying the fire, though it’s barely cold enough to have one going.

Tomorrow have Jess’ niece 6th birthday to go to for lunch then probably back to more GOT.

No idea Sunday. Might make Jess help me move wood. I’ll either get a hand or she’ll distract me with her womanly ways to avoid helping, win win I reckon

[bb41]

Saturday will be taking off plaster to brick level... I've managed to get a lot off, well it fell off just helped it on it's way a bit.
Ripping up smelly carpets and opening up fireplace .

Sunday will be a visit from youngest if she is not too hungover. . she has her 30th birthday next Wednesday and her partner has arranged a trip up to London to meet her friends ( who she thinks have forgotten and has spent the week whingeing that no one cares ) and then the second surprise of 5 days in Portugal , again she has no knowledge of

I'm hoping her OH has told her by Sunday as how I've not let it slip is beyond me , also sad that I can't spend her special day with her but OH is a lovely chap so shouldn't moan

Monday is looking cold so probably won't meet up with Grandson for a bimble in the mud, even off road I'm a fair weather sort !!

Nice bottle of Pinot after animals are fed today and possibly another on Sunday whilst doing Sunday lunch... the excitement is just too much sometimes

[D6Nutz]

Not a lot tonight. Mrs nutz has picked up some nice bits for dinner.

Tomorrow, parkrun followed by 10 miles at the hilly training ground known as ceasers camp. It's used by the Gurkha's for their training. Then taking the boy to the bike shop to be sized up fit a new bike.

Sunday, minor service on the vfr. Oil and air filters plus some fresh oil. The KTM needs a top-up so will do that at the eshe time. Then going over to my brother's fit a bit.

Monday, spend some time with the kids day. Not sure what yet.

Tuesday, back to work for a rest.

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[D41]

Nowt planned. It's supposed to rain on Sunday & Monday.
Beautiful weather today, though.

[Jack]

WSBK , BSB , MotoGP on the computer while I process all the shots I took of this lot today .

[Cav]

Nice work, Jack !!

We went to collect the engagement ring and our wedding rings yesterday.. fair play, the engagement ring is bloody lush!

The next 4 days I'm doing nothing but revising for my exam - except for a 50 minute break at 1pm when the MotoGP is on!!

[kiwikrasher]

So.. today I got the rest of the wood moved. But not the way I would’ve liked

The Ex contacted me yesterday, because Byron had flipped out, attempting self harm (tried to jam a fork in a power point) so I went around and took him to mine. He had terrorised the household that bad Nic was crying. I’d seen her cry 3 times in the 15 yes we were married. Jorja was hiding in her room with headphones on and barricaded between her bed and book shelve.

Thinking getting him out of the situation would calm him down. But no, I set myself up for a night and following day of nightmare.

So by today I lost my sh*t. He got rail roaded into helping move the wood. I worked that little prick for 3.5 hrs till he was broken. Through the rain, wind and all.

He showered afterwards and came out and gave in. Acknowledged all his sh*t behaviour and accepted his electronic bans (main reason he flipped out). So managed to get him back to his mums so they can end their time on a positive. I had been expecting to have him through till Wednesday when they both come to mine anyway.

I’m contacting the Autism Society tomorrow for re-assessment and evaluation. I’ve never wanted to medicate him but I’m now open to it if it’s deemed necessary.

Even Jess (who was there for it all) said she didn’t fully appreciate what he could be like till this weekend.

Sliver lining... Jess and My ex talked face to face today for the first time ever. Nic’s first words to Jess were ‘Im sorry you have to deal with this’
She never said sorry to me in 15 yrs

[D41]

By "this" did she mean "you"???

[C00kiemonster]

So.. today I got the rest of the wood moved. But not the way I would’ve liked

The Ex contacted me yesterday, because Byron had flipped out, attempting self harm (tried to jam a fork in a power point) so I went around and took him to mine. He had terrorised the household that bad Nic was crying. I’d seen her cry 3 times in the 15 yes we were married. Jorja was hiding in her room with headphones on and barricaded between her bed and book shelve.

Thinking getting him out of the situation would calm him down. But no, I set myself up for a night and following day of nightmare.

So by today I lost my sh*t. He got rail roaded into helping move the wood. I worked that little prick for 3.5 hrs till he was broken. Through the rain, wind and all.

He showered afterwards and came out and gave in. Acknowledged all his sh*t behaviour and accepted his electronic bans (main reason he flipped out). So managed to get him back to his mums so they can end their time on a positive. I had been expecting to have him through till Wednesday when they both come to mine anyway.

I’m contacting the Autism Society tomorrow for re-assessment and evaluation. I’ve never wanted to medicate him but I’m now open to it if it’s deemed necessary.

Even Jess (who was there for it all) said she didn’t fully appreciate what he could be like till this weekend.

Sliver lining... Jess and My ex talked face to face today for the first time ever. Nic’s first words to Jess were ‘Im sorry you have to deal with this’
She never said sorry to me in 15 yrs

Your a fecking hero matey. That's hard and good result I reckon!

[Kwacky]

You've got to strike a balance between what's best for your son and what's best for everyone around him. If medication helps him it'll help everyone. You don't want the other kids feeling isolated if all of your time and energy is being expended on Byron

[D6Nutz]

You've got to strike a balance between what's best for your son and what's best for everyone around him. If medication helps him it'll help everyone. You don't want the other kids feeling isolated if all of your time and energy is being expended on Byron

I agree entirely.

Also well done for handling the situation so well, those kinds of outbursts are as tough on the parents as they are the children.

Fwiw, the time may come where we have to help James with medication. The school are trying to get him assessed fur ADHD and if this is diagnosed the medication would help massively.

A guy I worked with a couple of years ago had a son, 11 or 12 I think, with sever ADHD. He had resisted medication for years until his school work started to really suffer and then he gave in. He said the change was amazing, his son was able to focus on work, football, and he built a really good friendship group at the same time. The main worry was the trade off of losing the bits e personality to the drugs, he said the he hasn't. The same personality was their, v just turned down a notch.

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[Deegee]

Sometimes being a Dad really sucks, not the same as Byron and yourself I know, but I spent 15 years being the thing that my ex threatened my oldest with when he didn’t toe the line behaviourally, our relationship suffered accordingly, but sometimes you have to be the stick. All I would say is, now you’ve succeeded where your Ex has failed once, don’t let her make calling you the Sword of Damocles hanging over your lad, it’ll erode your relationship with him for years.

[bb41]

So.. today I got the rest of the wood moved. But not the way I would’ve liked

The Ex contacted me yesterday, because Byron had flipped out, attempting self harm (tried to jam a fork in a power point) so I went around and took him to mine. He had terrorised the household that bad Nic was crying. I’d seen her cry 3 times in the 15 yes we were married. Jorja was hiding in her room with headphones on and barricaded between her bed and book shelve.

Thinking getting him out of the situation would calm him down. But no, I set myself up for a night and following day of nightmare.

So by today I lost my sh*t. He got rail roaded into helping move the wood. I worked that little prick for 3.5 hrs till he was broken. Through the rain, wind and all.

He showered afterwards and came out and gave in. Acknowledged all his sh*t behaviour and accepted his electronic bans (main reason he flipped out). So managed to get him back to his mums so they can end their time on a positive. I had been expecting to have him through till Wednesday when they both come to mine anyway.

I’m contacting the Autism Society tomorrow for re-assessment and evaluation. I’ve never wanted to medicate him but I’m now open to it if it’s deemed necessary.

Even Jess (who was there for it all) said she didn’t fully appreciate what he could be like till this weekend.

Sliver lining... Jess and My ex talked face to face today for the first time ever. Nic’s first words to Jess were ‘Im sorry you have to deal with this’
She never said sorry to me in 15 yrs

I never understood any of this until my Grandson went to live with his Dad and step Mum ,they have 3 other children and one has problems very similar.
I still can't comprehend what living in this environment 24/7 is really like and wish I could give some quality reassurance.

I popped down today as it was his sisters 5 th birthday and even that has to take second place to the needs of this young lad .
I've seen my G/sons step mum cry and I suppose as I'm not related I can offer a shoulder without being emotionally connected.
We have them all here for a bit of R and R and that helps a little but it is so demanding .

Hope and pretty sure you have the best support but if I hadn't seen first hand what that involves I would never understand

[duke63]

Guys and girls, you can get through it.

Patience, outside help, understanding and support are the way forward.

If you can get the child to understand they have a problem which they can get help with and it doesn't have to radically effect their life, then it is a big step forward. Society has such a narrow concept of what is normal, that if an individual doesn't fit that profile then it's seen as a problem. It shouldn't be that way. It helps if you can try and discuss his frustrations and how he is feeling, as it will help you understand too and also to make is easier to avoid any future problem.

Don't let those who should be helping him, say no. If they know the parent is serious about wanting and needing help, they are much more likely to support the situation.

Just to add, we had very similar problems with my son when he was young but he has just finished his dissertation in his last year at Uni and there is no reason why others in the same situation cannot go on to achieve in the way they want too.

[kiwikrasher]

Sometimes being a Dad really sucks, not the same as Byron and yourself I know, but I spent 15 years being the thing that my ex threatened my oldest with when he didn’t toe the line behaviourally, our relationship suffered accordingly, but sometimes you have to be the stick. All I would say is, now you’ve succeeded where your Ex has failed once, don’t let her make calling you the Sword of Damocles hanging over your lad, it’ll erode your relationship with him for years.

Good advice mate, thanks. And normally I’m at work when she has them so it’s only since I’ve been off that’s even an option.

[kiwikrasher]

Guys and girls, you can get through it.

Patience, outside help, understanding and support are the way forward.

If you can get the child to understand they have a problem which they can get help with and it doesn't have to radically effect their life, then it is a big step forward. Society has such a narrow concept of what is normal, that if an individual doesn't fit that profile then it's seen as a problem. It shouldn't be that way. It helps if you can try and discuss his frustrations and how he is feeling, as it will help you understand too and also to make is easier to avoid any future problem.

Don't let those who should be helping him, say no. If they know the parent is serious about wanting and needing help, they are much more likely to support the situation.

Just to add, we had very similar problems with my son when he was young but he has just finished his dissertation in his last year at Uni and there is no reason why others in the same situation cannot go on to achieve in the way they want too.

My biggest issue atm Duke is he won’t hold any responsibility for his actions. The start of any issues are always because he’s done something he shouldn’t have and then blames everyone else. I’ve spent countless hours working on cause and effect with him, explaining his behaviour drives the outcomes etc.

Feels like it’s just the perfect storm, puberty, hormones and starting high school which has come with bullying and other issues. I’m not afraid to admit my tool box is out of date and I need more help. So that’s todays job, to find it.

[Itchy]

I haven't got anything to offer that hasn't already been said, so here's a picture of a bird with some eyes drawn on a piece of paper put in front of it...

[kiwikrasher]

Lol classic!